The Washington Post

Keith B. Richburg

JAKARTA, Indonesia-Yunita L. Riana doesn't consider herself a revolutionary. But 11 years ago, she committed what for many in Indonesia's indigenous population might be considered an act of revolutionary proportions: She fell in love with, and married, an ethnic Chinese man. She was 17 when she became involved with Paul Tenggana, who is 10 years her elder. Her relatives were aghast. His wealthy family was not much better. They opposed the marriage, and still, she said, "I do not get along with his family." But what has been worse for her has been the insults, the threats, and the constant harassment she faces living as part of a mixed couple in ethnically divided Indonesia. Every day, she said, she fears for the safety of her two young sons. She described how even driving down the street in the family car can be a traumatic experience. "Every time we go anywhere, and my husband makes a little mistake driving, people say, 'Chinese! Stupid Chinese! I'll burn down your house.' "

"I get so depressed," she said. "Every time the same thing. 'I will burn down your house!' 'I will burn your car!' 'I will kidnap your children!' " She stopped briefly, tears welling in her eyes, her voice softly breaking as she tried to continue.

"I'm very upset," she said at last. "It's always been that way. But now, since May, it's become more frequent. If I have a problem with one of the housekeepers and I have to scold them, I think twice -- I don't want them to do anything stupid because this is a Chinese house. They might burn the house or kidnap the children, because it's a Chinese house." Her story gets worse. Lately, since the riots of May, people have been showing up at her front door every week, demanding money. And of course she gives the money, because she is afraid. "I've become like Santa Claus," she said. Not even the children are immune; young neighborhood toughs have showed up at the gates of her eldest son's Catholic junior high school, deriding the Chinese children for being rich in poor Indonesia, and demanding cash. She said it was love that drove her to marry Paul, when she was just 21. But now at 32, what love there was has been worn down by the constant struggle. "If I had a second chance," she conceded, "I wouldn't marry a Chinese. No way. It's too much trouble. Right now, I think love is stupid. I'm worried about my sons' safety."

"I do have regrets," she said, gently weeping. "I cannot talk to anyone -- not my husband, not my sons, because I don't want them to feel bad about being Chinese. I keep it in my heart." She has applied for a job in Ireland, in the tourism industry. But she knows her husband will not go, because even with the harassment and threats, he feels he belongs here.